Going out on New Year’s requires a certain optimism. You have to believe you’re going to have an evening worthy of sending off the old and ringing in the new. And while the high-pressure holiday has been known to net many people nights of a lifetime, it’s also resulted in plenty of us longingly thinking of the one that got away: their sofa, a cozy throw, shows primed for binge-watching.
So whether you’re planning to be the host with the most, make an appearance at the party (oh, you know which party), or are committing to ring in 2017 in a robe, here are a dozen things we’re sure you’ll see.
- Confetti: Depending on how you look at it—it’s either slightly larger glitter or slightly smaller trash. And yet: who can resist the allure of tossing some up just this one night? (And if it’s your house, be prepared to run into the joy of confetti throughout January, no matter how many times you vacuum.)
- Champagne that deserves better: He-llo, guest who went all out and brought some prime bubbly! This is not, we repeat, not the moment to say “eh, paper cups will work just as well.” Make sure you have plenty of crystallized glass champagne flutes on hand. And remember: they make a perfect hostess gift...
- Overly Festive Outfit: That jumpsuit is 100% appropriate, even if you are just watching Ryan Seacrest count it down. There is no such thing as overdressed. Yes, even if your best prospect for a New Year’s kiss is your pet. Also a note: why not be liberal in your definition of jumpsuit? Our favorite jumpsuit is white, plush, oversized, and made of sumptuous long-staple cotton. Yes, it’s a robe.
- The Early Countdown: Some people just can’t wait until midnight, so they decide that Australia, London, and the like are worth counting down for as well. Can you really complain about more champagne toasts? (This trick is also perfect for young children or especially tired adults.)
- The Early Snoozer: Oh hey there, person you were chatting with just moments ago, who has now dozed off on the sofa, glasses still on, legs askew. Do them a favor and let them keep sleeping. Earn some karma in those last hours of 2016 by covering them with a lambswool and cashmere fringed throw.
- Someone Ghosting Early: Speaking of early, when did they leave? Were they even here?
- The Moment of Reflection: Now’s the time where we go around the room and make some gentle declarations about what’s in store for you next year. It’s the moment to ask yourself: will 2017 be the year I’m the type that serves my guests drinks with Belgian flax linen cocktail napkins rather than paper ones? Should it be the year?
- The Conversation Trap: Turns out all you and that old coworker had in common was a mutual distrust of that shifty girl who handled the supply orders. Without the intricacies of ignored pen requests, there's very little to discuss. Which means it’s the perfect moment for Oh hey, I’m going to go check out the snack selection! Can I grab you anything?
- The Unhinged Snack Selection: From overly-ambitious (are those coq au vins nuggets?) to the last-minute (we recognize boxed funfetti cake when we see it!) Everything looks better when served on beautiful platters – preferably lightweight and highly durable porcelain ones. Here’s hoping your host did their due diligence and stocked up.
- The More Socially-Lubricated Moment of Reflection: Who’s to say I have to become the type of person to own linen cocktail napkins? What if that person has always been inside of me? What if all it takes to free that person is to get on my phone right now and order them right now. Wait, where is my phone?
- Losing Your Phone. At a party? Someone else probably and accidently snagged it without noticing that you have entirely different cases. At home? Check between sofa cushions. Ignore any remaining confetti.
- The First Coffee Of 2017. What? If it’s wrong to daydream about your morning mug in all its delicate and perfectly-designed glory while out for the night, we don’t want to be right.
Happy New Year, all!